Sell your soul expensively. Money is the source of respectability. Honor and dignity are matters of perspective and money can buy the best angle for you. When someone wants to buy your soul, to corrupt you, this means you are a valuable commodity, you are a top priority necessity. Embrace the opportunity. Be proud of becoming a cunt and use your money to buy respect, admiration and very useful friends. Turn your soul’s rectum into a motorway tunnel for money, opportunity, the transaction of dignity and the foundations to the castle that will make you respectable. From the highest tower you will built fast (much faster than you ever imagined), announce how ethics defined your route to success. Present yourself as the most pure and virginal rectum that ever lived. This way you will get admiration and love from millions and substantially reduce the upcoming of new rivals, since there’s still a chance of them believing you. As for serious competition, you only need to manage your money wisely in order to beat them. Be smarter and unmerciful, while remaining kind and the model for virtue. You are now the cunt with the sweetest eyes ever and the most beautiful aura of grace and sanctity of all creation.
Don’t be consistent but do look consistent. Build your consistency on your appearance, adding some eccentric traits to justify what might look consistent. You are a unique person who embraces the causes of everyone. Support both genocide and human rights on the grounds of self-defense and the need for exceptions on certain circumstances. Show strong conviction when making decisions and excuse your failures and selfish interests with shades of gray. Turn facts into a matter of perspective. When a vase falls to the ground, the ground can rise to the vase. Take your virtuosity on perspective to the point of making your victims feel grateful for the pain, suffering and death you inflict upon them. Exhale serenity, kindness and assertiveness, profound understanding and empathy, and the humble joy of the coolest wise. Become a brand like Coca-Cola. No matter the dark stories about you some martyrs will scavenge, you will always be favorite.
Publish about making a fortune online. Create a blog and a video channel about making a fortune online. Share content from other bloggers and youtubers about making a fortune online in exchange for them sharing your content about making a fortune online. Hire ghost writers to write serial books about making a fortune online and create courses and seminars to teach people who want to make a fortune online how to make a fortune online with the tools provided by the serial books about making a fortune online by teaching how to teach about making a fortune online. Share behind the scenes clips and footage of your hard work as a content creator about making a fortune online. In case you make a fortune online, show it off like crazy. Make a TED talk. You are the messiah.
Act as if you win by default. Make other people believe you always win. You don’t have to make it as a matter of perspective. Focus on making real winners feel like losers. Install guilt, remorse, shame and failure on them. Pick anything they have done during competition and make it dirty, obnoxious, repulsive and inexcusable. Very important! Do this kindly, as if you’re doing all you can to help the poor bastard. This is to be done repeatedly, and in no time you will believe to be magnanimous.
Always support your friend. If your friend is racist, sexist, irrational, violent, dishonest, loud, presumptuous and abusive, become yourself racist, sexist, irrational, violent, dishonest, loud, presumptuous and abusive also. You must agree with your friend and provide the favorite suggestions of behavior. Never list your principles. Do your best to have none but present yourself as having the ones of your friend. Boast stories about your daring behavior, no matter how fictional they are, as long as you provide a lot of detail. Believe in your fiction to the point of actually look sincere. Make part of the groups and communities your friend loves most. In case you get exhausted of trying to be somebody else and rape your remaining ethics, remember the torture of being lonely. That not being enough to boost you, consider getting another best friend forever and start from scratch.
Be dishonest. Buy cheap and sell expensively. Avoid paying salaries. Promote your image as a philanthropist. Don’t bother on being original. Copy other’s ideas and present them as your own. Sabotage all competition. Get the monopoly. Bribe everyone. Make friends with good Samaritans and pretend to support their causes. Be an ally to every religion. Engage with sports. Believe your villainy is an altruistic sacrifice for a higher cause.
Get real. Pretend you care. Rest as much as possible. Once you freak out, take the medicines. Make good friends wherever you go to. Learn how to awesomely masturbate.
Always tell people what they want to ear, using as much clichés as possible. Leave the truth for presumptuous losers.